Fat and Confident in a Skinny World

I was always a really weird kid. 

I was weird and goofy and funny and loud and I LOVED IT. I had a strong sense of self (thanks Dad) and was filled to the brim with confidence. You couldn’t tell me or my imaginary friends anything! 😎

But then things started to change. I got a little older and began to understand the world a little better. 🧐

I learned when you’re a woman and bigger than the people around you, society tends to prescribe you labels. 

I was learning that I was big and big is bad, disgusting even.

This created a lot of conflict for me internally. After all I had a strong sense of self and I knew that I wasn’t bad...but it was now clear that I was big. How was I to reconcile the two? How could I go on being myself to the fullest when everyone around me was telling me my fullest self was wrong?

On the outside it looked like confidence, it looked like body positivity activism, it looked like challenging the status quo. I spoke in ways that insisted that it was society that needed fixing and that I was good enough despite my size. 

Turns out I didn’t really believe the messages I stood for. I was determined to convince the world, but couldn’t be convinced myself. I was going through the motions but still felt so much shame around being a larger person.

This quietly and persistently affected my self esteem, but I couldn’t bring myself to admit it to anyone. Not even me.

Meet one of my personal demons: Avoidance. 

Every time I would have a negative emotion about my body I would immediately shun it away and replace it with, what I now to be, toxic positivity.

I was not addressing the root of the emotions I was having I was only slapping on body-posi bandaid and calling it a day.

I was faking it, and it was working (kinda). I fooled everyone around me into believing that I was happy with myself and my appearance, all while secretly wishing I was a size 4. Never actually addressing my real feelings would affect my health and my romantic relationships in subtle, yet detrimental ways for years.

I would: 

Pass up on great people (what if they reject me ‘cause of my weight)

Date duds (sure things = safer)

Self sabotage 

Cancel on dates and social events

Ignore my nutrition

Become triggered by numbers on a scale.

Avoid the gym (hello anxiety!!)

Overeat to soothe my feelings

Photoshop my pictures

Feel insecure when I looked confident

But that all changed.

I now:

Am so much happier

Am oozing with real confidence

Feel healthier

Delight in my nutrition

Don’t stress the numbers on the scale (or the measuring tape).

Fixed my relationship with food

Love the gym

Am 35 lbs lighter (my knees are thanking me)

Post real photos with my tummy showing.

This is where you’d expect to hear about some diet or workout program that changed my life. But it was neither of those things. 

It turns out all those problems I was having were symptoms of a self worth that needed some repair. I had no idea. 

So how did I do it?

I didn’t even set out to lose weight. The truth is I figured out the formula to repairing self worth and generating real confidence. 

And it absolutely changed my life. 🙌🏼♥️

Get the Formula Here. Because you’re worth it.